What if I die today?

This thought just struck me as to what would be of me  and lives of others around me if I suddenly die today (you might think that I am stating death with levity. But No. So moving on) ?

My course of life is over. But of others? I wonder. How will they be affected?

Then I started moving step by step to analyze how the scenario would be.

So supposing

suddenly

I

Die.

Maybe I slip on the stairs and fall down. Maybe the  moving fan  falls over my head. Maybe I just (out of nowhere) get a heart attack ( This is less likely as I exercise regularly :) ). But anyways,not diverting from what I am trying to say.

I die.

What will happen now?

My parents and concerned relatives would be grieving.

My friends would be upset.

Numerous people will sympathize with them.

Some would be happy.

Some would be faking grief ( for what purpose I wonder).

And besides these 0.000000000001% people, rest all would be untouched, unaffected, unaware of my death or even my existence before death.

And since everyone has to move on with their lives,  my parents, siblings, relatives, friends will have to get over my loss and will move on. My foes will have to look for another foe.

So what will remain of me? A “mere thought” in 10 people’s minds. I would be remembered many times a day in the beginning, then a few times in a month, then a handful of times in a year and finally on my birthdays and death days ( with a few more days added). After all I will just be a “mere thought”. Not an effect or an influence . Not an energy or a feeling.

So what will be left of my existence. A photograph ( that too a smug one. I am unable to smile in a photograph)!!

After all of the above theory I felt-What am I doing to myself ? This is a sheer wastage of the human life that I am. I could do nothing to make myself live. I just existed. It would have been equivalent if I would have been born as a bird or a cow!! Atleast in India we worship cow for it gives us milk !!! So a cow’s life would be better than the life as I am existing  !!!!!

Seems ridiculous isn’t it.

Now I wonder, what should I really do to make my human life worth living for? Should I be famous to make myself worth my life? Or should I be in the defense forces to make myself worth it? Should I become an entrepreneur and open a company and make it known ? Or should I maybe step in the shoes of Einstein and create a new mind-boggling theory ?What should I really do?

Firstly, I needed to get my head straight that being famous does not mean being really worth it. Even Hitler was infamous and great for what he did, remember?!?!

Then I remembered a quote-

” People will forget what you wrote, what you said, how you looked. But they will never forget how you made them feel. “

Feel. The secret to leading and living our life is feeling and making others feel. One deed done to a person would spread like wildfire to everyone else and will definitely come back to you. Its a cycle of feeling and doing. What better if the doing or feeling is good!!!

You help one person and see how the rest are helped. You make one person smile and see how 20 others smile because you made 1 person feel happy.  Its all a chain and cycle of events.

Its the Butterfly effect!!

Thus all in all, what it takes to live and not exist? Just a positive feeling and a feeling of giving back to the society. We don’t have to be Bill Gates to do this. We just have to be “ourselves”. We need to the best in what we can do the best and finally do good to the society in whichever way we can. If my best is opening a company,I should open it. If my best is singing, I should sing. If my best is teaching, I should teach. But do the best in my best and do good to others.

We will rise, the people around us will rise, the people around them rise and without you and I realizing we will be changing many lives!!!! Nice rhyme :))

Be Good, Do Good. And your and my life would no longer be a photograph after we die but a feeling, an experience and who knows a phenomenon!! :)

New-she

She stares out of the window. Rainwater running down the window pane. Drop by drop. Unlike the time around her. Blank. Thinking about her life just a few days back. Was it truly her life? Is that how she wanted her life to be? In reality. I wonder. She wondered.  She thinks. At least I had a job. Someway to utilize my time. Sorry, did I just write ‘utilize’? Someway to vile away her time at a place which she loathed, around the people so shallow, hollow and archaic robots!

She had been torturing herself by working in a company which she was never really interested to work for . She could not  develop an interest in it even after 5 years . Worked with people whom she first looked up to and in five years started looking them down. She earned well. Great to be true. Six figures is great for 5 years. She completed her studies in the way she had thought  she wanted to. Successful, not immediately though. But yes after certain setbacks and hurdles, she came up and in the end was successful in her career.

Now she is jobless for 2 weeks, not disconsolate though. Jobless by choice or by her past actions. One day after waking up and getting ready for her usual “job”, she stopped, sat down, opened her system and with ruthless yet smooth strokes typed a resignation letter to her “boss”. She had truly woken up that day. She didn’t think twice because every time she thought she deleted the letter that she had typed. But today she didn’t think. Just wrote. And with her grey matter throbbing hard against her skull to come out and congratulate her along with her pounding heart went to the office and gave him the resignation. He looked at her with quizzical eyes and made her sit down. For the first time she never uttered a word. Just smiled ,left the office and went to coffee shop. Had her favorite cappuccino, one after another ,just enjoying the rain. She had not felt the rain for a long time. That day she did. Felt every drop of it. The rain soaked her and washed away all the inhibitions. She was truly awake in the past five years.

2 weeks on, she did that she had not done in the past 5 years. Treated her enervated mind and body with exercise and literature. She started writing . Opened a free blog. Joined a small dance class.  Called up her parents and friends. And is going to go  trekking day after tomorrow alone. And just a few hours back has applied for a course in journalism in a university.  Hopeful that she will get a scholarship. I hope too.

Now she is looking out of the window. In the rain. Her residence is same, her locality is same but with a different niche. She is different. She is herself. Her eyes reflecting the serenity, contentment and the energy lighting the flame of her newly-discovered life.

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